50 Unhinged Would You Rather Questions (Vote Live)
50 unhinged, insane Would You Rather questions with completely deranged choices. Vote live on 15 and see who else lost it, plus 35 more to read aloud.
These are unhinged Would You Rather questions, the insane ones: geese, llamas, dinosaur costumes and choices no reasonable person should ever have to make. They're for the group chat at 2am and the friend who answers every hypothetical way too seriously. The first 15 are live polls, so vote and see how many people chose chaos. Back to the main collection →
Completely Deranged
Would you rather have a goose follow you everywhere or a raccoon live in your backpack?
Would you rather replace all your furniture with bouncy castles or all your floors with trampolines?
Would you rather only communicate through interpretive dance or through a kazoo?
Would you rather have a pet lobster that hates you or a pet goat that loves you too much?
Would you rather fight 50 angry geese or one very determined swan?
Chaos at Work and School
Would you rather show up to every meeting in a dinosaur costume or narrate everything like a nature documentary?
Would you rather replace your car horn with a goat scream or your doorbell with a fire alarm?
Would you rather have a talking parrot as your boss or a very smart dog as your teacher?
Would you rather end every email with "love you" or start every email with "URGENT"?
Would you rather sit on a yoga ball everywhere or stand on a skateboard everywhere?
Absolutely Not
Would you rather eat soup with a fork for a year or cereal with chopsticks for a year?
Would you rather adopt 30 cats or one emotionally unstable llama?
Would you rather wear a full suit of armor every day or a wedding dress every day?
Would you rather be chased by a slow zombie forever or a fast one for one minute?
Would you rather have your mom narrate your dates or your grandpa commentate your workouts?
More unhinged questions (read-aloud list)
- Would you rather box a kangaroo or arm-wrestle a gorilla?
- Would you rather have a goose officiate your wedding or a pigeon as your best man?
- Would you rather replace your arms with pool noodles or your legs with pogo sticks?
- Would you rather scream every time you sneeze or sneeze every time you scream?
- Would you rather live in an IKEA forever or in a Costco forever?
- Would you rather have your phone autocorrect every word to "banana" or every word to "help"?
- Would you rather be legally required to wear a cape or legally required to wear clown makeup?
- Would you rather have a seagull steal your food every day or a crow steal your keys every day?
- Would you rather be followed everywhere by a mariachi band or a marching band?
- Would you rather have spaghetti for hair and meatballs for eyes or be a walking taco?
- Would you rather replace every "the" you say with "moo" or end every sentence with a scream?
- Would you rather have a sock puppet do all your talking or a ventriloquist dummy?
- Would you rather drive a car shaped like a hot dog or ride a bike shaped like a shark?
- Would you rather adopt a family of feral raccoons or a group of very polite rats?
- Would you rather your only shoes be swim flippers or high heels?
- Would you rather every elevator you enter play heavy metal or every store play bagpipes?
- Would you rather be able to summon a single pigeon at will or a single crab at will?
- Would you rather have your voice replaced with dolphin clicks or goat bleats?
- Would you rather duel people with pool noodles or settle every argument with a rap battle?
- Would you rather marry a mannequin or live with a cardboard cutout as a roommate?
- Would you rather sleep in a bathtub full of jelly beans or a hammock made of spaghetti?
- Would you rather be crowned king of the squirrels or president of the pigeons?
- Would you rather get a tattoo chosen by your worst enemy or a haircut chosen by a toddler?
- Would you rather sing your passwords out loud or type with your nose forever?
- Would you rather adopt a cow that thinks it's a dog or a dog that thinks it's a cow?
- Would you rather lick a battery once or eat a crayon every day?
- Would you rather have your house slowly fill with balloons or with ball-pit balls?
- Would you rather bark when you're happy or hiss when you're annoyed?
- Would you rather be haunted by a ghost who only wants to gossip or one who only wants to dance?
- Would you rather set off a car alarm every time you yawn or a smoke detector every time you make toast?
- Would you rather be best friends with a crocodile or roommates with an ostrich?
- Would you rather wear a full banana costume to court or to your own wedding?
- Would you rather start every sentence with "In my professional opinion" or end every sentence with "as foretold"?
- Would you rather have a talking toilet or a sarcastic shower?
- Would you rather have to fist-bump every stranger or salute every dog you see?
Want to run one of these as a live vote with your group? Start one here — it takes 30 seconds and you get a link that updates as people vote.